Meet the Herd: Inside Milton Keynes Roller Derby
On a Sunday morning at Courtside in Bletchley, while much of the city is still waking up, a group of people are lacing up quad skates and learning how to fall over safely. Some have skated since they were kids. Plenty have never worn a pair of skates in their lives. All of them are welcome. This is Milton Keynes Roller Derby, the city's skater-owned-and-run flat-track roller derby league, and getting new people through the door is a big part of what they do.
If roller derby is new to you, here is the short version. It is a full-contact team sport played on quad skates around a flat oval track. Two teams skate together, each trying to get their scoring player through the pack while the others block. Flat-track just means it is played on a level surface, like a sports hall floor, rather than a banked track, which is what makes it possible for local leagues to set up almost anywhere.
Everyone in the herd
The thing MK Roller Derby want people to know first is that they take everyone. Their words are that they welcome everyone into the herd, regardless of gender, age or skating experience. You need to be at least 18 to join, but there is no upper limit, and no experience is needed at all.
You do not have to be a player either. Roller derby needs referees and non-skating officials to run a bout, and the league is just as happy to train people up for those roles. So whether you want to skate, referee, or help run the game from the side of the track, there is a place for you.
For anyone who fancies trying it, the beginner classes run on Sunday mornings at Courtside in Bletchley, with new intakes almost every month. You do not need your own gear to start, because the league offers kit hire for anyone who does not yet have skates, pads or a helmet. To get all the details, you just email the team at mkrdltd@gmail.com and they will take it from there.
The Teams
MK Roller Derby run two teams. The A team squad, skate as the Concrete Cows, a nod to the city's most famous public art. The B team, the Udder Team, was set up in 2014 to bring on newer skaters and give them competitive game time.
The cow theme runs right through the club, which tells you something about how they carry themselves. This is a serious sport played by people who do not take themselves too seriously.
Fifteen years of local derby
The league has deeper roots in Milton Keynes than you might expect. It was set up in May 2010 by former members of Bedfordshire Roller Girls, held its first closed-door bout that November, and skated its first public bout in September 2011. That makes it fifteen years of roller derby in the city.
They made their mark early. In 2011 the league created its own tournament, the End of the World Series, bringing together five local leagues, and went on to win the first edition undefeated in 2012. They also competed in the Heartland Series, which grew into the British Championships, finishing joint third in 2013.
Gold for the Concrete Cows
The reason the league is in the news right now is a recent one. The Concrete Cows, the A team, took gold in their tier at the Five Nations Roller Derby tournament, the championship that brings together leagues from across the UK and Ireland. Standing on top of the podium against that kind of field is a real achievement, and one worth shouting about 6 back-to-back wins and your highest global ranking in 10 years.
More than a team
Like a lot of the best local clubs, MK Roller Derby put a good deal back into the city. Over the years they have raised money for Willen Hospice, most recently with their Go MOO campaign, as well as Race for Life, the Moldova Project and the Chilterns MS Centre. Being skater-owned and run means every hour that goes into the club, on the track and off it, comes from the people who skate for it.
What is next
There is more to come this autumn. The league has a triple header coming up in September, three bouts in one day, with the schedule and tickets still being finalised. We will share the full details on MKlife once they are set, so keep an eye out.
In the meantime, if you have ever watched roller derby and thought you would love to give it a go, this is your sign. The herd is open, no experience needed, kit provided. Just email mkrdltd@gmail.com to find out about the next intake.
You can find out more about the league, the teams and how to get involved at miltonkeynesrollerderby.org.
Published by MK Life, an independent Milton Keynes city guide. Details correct at time of publishing.